Parent Profile: Meet Megan!
Welcome to our Itzy Ritzy Parent Profile! We love featuring the amazing parents in our community! For this parent profile, we're featuring Megan Carlson. She has a special connection to The Miracle Boss Plus, learn more about Megan and her family below. Stay tuned til the end for a giveaway!
Your name: Megan Carlson
Your children's names and ages: I have two angel babies and two Earth-side children. Penelope "Penny" is 4 years old and Thorsten "Thor" is 2 years old.
Tell us a little bit about your family: I'm a Speech-Language Pathologist for a school district in Northwest Indiana; I've also worked in the nursing home setting. My husband, Joe, is a Senior Field Sales Engineer who works from home most of the time. When I get home from work, the kids and I get some playtime in, have dinner and then relax by watching a movie or reading a story before bedtime.
Where does your family live? We currently live in Northwest Indiana, but my husband and I were born and raised in Illinois.
What is your favorite activity to do with your little ones? My favorite activity to do with my kids is taking them to the park or playing outside. They could play for hours and I could watch them all day just laughing and having fun!
How did you first discover Itzy Ritzy? One of my best friends sent me a Taupe Double Take™ Crossbody for my birthday one year! Since then, I have become a big fan of Itzy Ritzy.
Fave Itzy Ritzy product: This is a tough one, but I'd have to go with my Itzy Mini™ Diaper Bag. It's very convenient and functional for just me, the kids, or both me and the kids! The Mini can hold ALL the essentials and more.
The best part of my day is... When I get to come home and see my kids. They're always so excited to see me! As soon as I walk in the door, one of them yells: "Mama! We missed you" and it brings a smile to my face every time.
What drew you to The Miracle Boss Plus? What drew me to The Miracle Boss Plus was the meaning behind the design and the name. Being a loss mama is hard, especially when you feel like you’re going through the journey alone. When I was finally blessed with my rainbow, she was truly a miracle. Since then, rainbows have a special meaning to me. They remind me of hope, to have courage and stay strong. Rainbows remind me that things will always be ok. It’s the promise after the storm. I wear my Miracle Boss with pride and explain to anyone that will listen the beautiful meaning behind the bag.
Why is World Pregnancy + Infant Loss/SIDS Awareness Month important to you? This month is very important to me because I feel like these subjects need to be talked about. It helps with the healing process. My first two pregnancies ended in loss; something I never expected to go through. It was devastating and so hard not to blame myself. I deserved to be upset, angry, emotional and not hide those feelings. After my first loss, I made a Facebook post about it. I had a few friends and family members reach out saying they also went through a pregnancy loss, but had never talked about it. I didn't know that sharing my experience would encourage others to open up and share theirs. I'm glad I did it. Even now, almost 6 years later, it's not easy to talk about. I feel like I went through this so that I could be there for others and spread awareness. Sharing my experience has helped me cope and remember my babies I lost.
What can we all do to support those going through loss?
- Be there! Show up! Even if you just sit in silence or hold them while they cry, your presence means a lot.
- Give space as long as its needed. Sometimes it might take a minute for them to open up and share what's going on or how they're feeling. Everyone grieves differently.
- Let them know you are there for them. Send a text or make that phone call letting them know you're here for whatever they may need.
- Say their child's name. Bring them up.
- Make a care package.
- Make a meal and bring it over.
- Send "Thinking of You" flowers or an Edible Arrangement. After my first loss, my two best friends sent me flowers. I was overwhelmed by their thoughtfulness and kind words. I still have the card.
- Acknowledge when someone doesn't want to talk about their loss. Some people prefer to keep the loss private, respect this.
Do you have any advice for parents going through a loss right now?
- If someone offers to make dinner or give you a break from taking care of the kids, take them up on it!
- Be kind on yourself.
- Take all the time you need to grieve.
- Reach out when you feel the need to. That extra support from family and friends is sometimes necessary when grieving. You're not bothering them.
- Seek out counseling, if necessary. This helped me so much after my losses. Get all the support you need on your journey.
- Advocate for yourself. The OB I was seeing during the time of my losses was unsympathetic and looked at what I was going through as "normal". I needed someone who understood and could relate to my nervousness and anxiety surrounding loss.
- Communication is key. Talk to your partner about how you're feeling. This is an unimaginable journey that you're going through together. If you open up to each other, it will help the healing and may ease the hurt you're feeling.
What should we avoid saying to someone suffering a loss?
- Never begin a sentence with "At least..."
- "At least you know you can get pregnant," "At least you weren't that far along," "At least you already have a healthy child/children," etc.
- "When are you going to start trying again?"
- "Everything happens for a reason."
- "It just wasn't the right time."
- "I was really looking forward to being a grandma/grandpa/aunt/uncle."
- "Look on the bright side."
- "You should have done..."
- "This is such a common thing."
What would you recommend we stay instead?
- "I'm so sorry."
- "I'm here if you need anything" or "What can I do for you?"
- "I'm thinking of you."
- "This sucks and I'm sorry you're going through this."
- "Your baby mattered."
- "You are not alone."
- "Be kind to yourself" or "Take care of yourself."
- "Take all the time you need to grieve. There is no timeline on grief."
- "You did nothing wrong. This is not your fault."
- "I love you!"
- "It's okay to not be okay."
What resources would you recommend for those suffering a loss? There are so many wonderful and supportive groups, accounts and literature out there. It's as easy as a Google search to find a plethora of resources and answers to questions. Here's a list of resources I found most helpful on my journey:
- Instagram Accounts:
- @pregancyafterlosssupport - This is a great account for those expecting after a loss.
- Facebook Groups:
- Recurrent Miscarriage/Multiple Miscarriage Support
- Miscarriage Matters Support Group
- Miscarriage Support
- Miscarriage and Infant Loss Support Group
- Grace Like Scarlett: Grieving with Hope After Miscarriage and Loss - Adriel Booker
- Grieving the Child I Never Knew: A Devotional for Comfort in the Loss of Your Unborn or Newly Born Child - Kathe Wunnenberg
- Empty Arms: Coping with Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Death - Sherokee Ilse
- Loved Baby: 31 Devotions Helping You Grieve and Cherish Your Child After Pregnancy Loss - A Devotional Book on How to Cope, Mourn, and Heal After Losing a Baby - Sarah Philpott
- Grief Day by Day: Simple Practices and Daily Guidance for Living with Loss - Jan Warner
- Men and Miscarriage: A Dad's Guide to Grief, Relationships, and Healing After Loss - Aaron Gouveia